Looking back at the past four and a half months, two thoughts cross my Mind. The first is: I can hardly believe how fast the first half of my stay, five months, is almost over! Yet with that being said, my second thought is: Do I really still have five more months left? These two completely contradicting thoughts have characterized my stay here in almost every way possible, for--as the old cliche` goes--there have been plenty of ups and downs.

As soon as I arrived in Changzhou, I immediately wanted to get on a plan and go back home. Its really easy to sit on the sofa in your natural home in your natural country and count down the days you have left before you leave somewhere. However, once the countdown stops, things begin to get increasingly more complicated. I loved the idea of going to China--a far of place filled with mystery and enchantment--and I couldn't wait to get here. When I first arrive, though, I was terrified. I suddenly got the horrible feeling of missing home--even though I had only been gone for five days--and everything that was normal in my life. Gradually the feelings subsided, and now that I've been here for so long, I've realized that nothing is quite normal in this world....nothing is black and white anymore. In fact, being in China has taught me that this world exhibits more colors than a rainbow! I have learned so many new things, and I've met so many new people, that I am able to see that everything is different--and often exciting. Even in a country that has everything dictated by a central authority, I have found people to be fairly inviting and willing to share their world; this was something that I definitely wasn't expecting. By learning the language and culture of this place, two things that go hand-in-hand, I have gotten a better appreciation for all that is here.

Before you get ready to shout to the world about my enlightenment and join me on my journey, I should also let you know that this place isn't exactly a land of milk and honey. The school that I'm at has probably been the hardest thing to deal with. People here have extremely bad organizational skills, so it's very hard to get things done quickly and ahead of time. I also feel like a second-class citizen; there is definitely racial discrimination here: my office is four walls (probably asbestos-ridden) that a crumbling with a fan that is about to fall from the ceiling and a light that doesn't work, my teachers will miss classes because any small thing that comes up automatically receives priority over teaching me, I was given a computer that's as large as an elephant, as old as a fossil and as slow as a tortoise glued to the floor, and many promises that have been made are not kept.

Due to all this coupled with my intensifying urge to see my natural family and friends again, I've been thinking a lot about giving up on my journey and going home. While I have ultimately decided against it, the idea to get on a plane in a couple weeks and head home sure has been tempting. However, I believe that God has brought me here for a reason; I feel as though the Chinese people are supposed to teach me something in return for something I teach them. I'm not exactly sure what those things are yet, so I know I must see this journey to its natural completion. Besides, my host-family (except occasionally my host-brother who tends to annoy me with his habits) has been amazing! They have taught me so much, and now it is my turn to repay the favor! As I stated in the preamble of this message, there has been a lot of good and a lot of bad in my experience so far. Knowing that half of my time here is now over is giving me new energy to conquer the day. And while it is reassuring to know that I will be back to my natural-home soon, it's going to be hard to leave my second home here...

Best Wishes Forever and Always,
Jonathan A. Miller
乔 纳 森 a.k.a  乔 乔