My TEC Experience--The Beginning of the End (For a While)

Hello All,

This past weekend, I worked for my fourth time at TEC--Teens Encountering Christ, a Christian youth-retreat. This really was the beginning of my goodbyes...

I went through TEC #40 as a candidate, and TEC #41 was my first TEC working (it happens four times a year). What TEC has brought to me is a better relationship with God, a great community of support, and my closest friends (oh boy...here comes the tears). I'll never have to say goodbye to God; He will always be there next to me. I did, however, have to say goodbye to all of my amazing friends.

Growing up, I was (not trying to brag) always the smart kid. In elementary school, when that meant you were the cool kid, I had a lot of friends and a couple super close ones. However, as the years passed, things got harder--people grew apart, and being smart wasn't as attractive as it used to be. Thus, I was left with hardly any great friends; I had some great acquaintances, but there was no one that I could really confide in. During those years, I can remember that I cried with my mom multiple times about how I wasn't that liked anymore in school...It was an extremely hard time; I truly believed that no one cared for me anymore--not even God.

When my brother Michael finally had me go to TEC (and I was SO close to not doing it), that all changed. I had great table leaders, Kathy Door and David Groendyk--who helped changed my spirit. With their help, I realized that God did really care. However, while I was close with my table group, I still didn't have very many people to talk to; I still didn't think I was loved by anyone else.

I decided to work the next TEC (this past one happened to be at the same place), and that is where I found my best of friends who I could count on. One of them, I met over a bottle of spilt Listerine. Another, I met because I didn't want to be creeped out by a stranger always hanging around anymore (You guys know who you are!). They were the ones who helped me build a support and friend network that I have charished ever since. With the other TEC's that I have worked, I have met other AMAZING people who have shown me that there is still love out there (including one that I met over a Physics shirt and another that I met because I was assigned to clean with him)...too many to name!

With this past weekend being the last TEC weekend that I will be able to work until, by the grace of God, I return in a year, things got pretty emotional towards the end. We still have a reunion in two weeks, but this was pretty much the last time that I would see most of them for a year. I began to cry as a hugged all of my great friends and said goodbye...it hurt so much.

I know that I am going to a place in which you have to register to worship or face pursecution...a place where I will have no support group (at least in the beginning)...a place where I could become separated from my faith in God. This weekend has comforted me and taught me that I can be strong, starting with an amazing prayer-time with an extremely Godly-woman (Thank you so much...you know who you are!). Even though I know that I can be strong with God's help, I am still scared--I am still sad--about being away from my great support group and awesome, Godly friends.

I want to thank all of those who have made me seen that God and others do care and love me; I am not alone anymore in my faith and in this world...Thank you for such an amazing time here...I will see you in a year's time.

With Blessings Forever,
Jonathan A. Miller